Hilarious Bar and Drinking
jokes that are guaranteed to make you laugh.
Title: Twas the night before X-mas
Category:
Bar Jokes
Twas the Night before X-masT'was the night before christmas- Old Santa was pissedHe cussed out the elves and through down his listMiserable little brats, ungrateful little jerksI have a good mind to scrap the whole worksI've busted my ass for damn near a yearInstead of thanks Santa what do I hearThe Old lady bitches cause I work late at nightThe elves want more money the reindeers all fightRudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS And just when I thought that things would get betterThose assholes from IRS sent me a letterThey say I owe taxes-if that ain't damn funnyWho the hell ever sent Santa Claus any moneyAnd the kids these days- they all are the pits They want the impossible. . . Those mean litttle shitsI spent a whole year making wagons and sledsAssembling dolls. . . . Their arms, legs, and headsI made a ton of yo yo's No request for them They want computers and robots. . . . . they think I'm IBMIf you thinks that bad. . . just picture thisTry holding their pants full of piss They pull on my nose they grab at my beard And if I don't smile the parents think I'm wierdFlying through the air. . . dodging the trees Falling down chimmneys and skinning their kneesI'm quitting this job. . . there's just no enjoymentI'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment There's no christmas this year. . . . now you know the reason I found me a blonde . . . I'm going south for the season
